In the book Fathers Sons & Brothers, Brett Lott uses many very interesting writing techniques throughout the book. The one strategy I chose to expand on was Lott’s analytical writing technique. Unlike typical books Lott not only writes about what happened but he also describes what he was thinking. This strategy of basically analyzing his own writing helps us as the readers comprehend why Lott chooses the stories that are included in his book. I think this is important because unlike The Liars Club that we read earlier, Fathers sons & Brothers includes stories that are less substantial in the context that is included. I think Lott uses this analytical technique along side his stories to get across what he wants you to get from the story. I think this is an interesting strategy for a book mostly because he doesn’t always use the core events in his story to teach a lesson more-so he uses his own thoughts and opinions on these events.
This is shown very clearly in a strong sentence at the end of the Brothers essay, “What I believe is this: That pinch was entry into our childhood; my arm around him, our smiling, is proof of us two surfacing, alive but not unscathed. And here are my own two boys, already embarked”. Lott uses these thoughts to describe his feelings on the similarities between his relationship with his brother, and the relationship between his two children. This is one of many instances throughout the book where this technique is utilized to enhance the lessons behind these essays in the book. Analytically writing about his own experiences, while an unusual techniques it enhances the story and helps not only the readers, but I feel it also helps Lott himself realize what needs to be taken away from his essays.
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I think your thesis is clear and argumentative, because others could say this isn't a good way for an author to write. But I agree, I think it does help the reader!
ReplyDeleteThe author and title are correctly stated and I think the quote you used works really well with your thesis, but I think you need to find more, and you might have a hard time finding them. Hopefully you can because as I said, I think its a good thesis.
I think you used to right amount of summary to help explain what you were thinking,and I didn't see that you used too much opinion.
Overall, I just think you need to expand some more and find more relating quotes. Other then that, I think your ideas are really good, and you pointed out something I had not really noticed before but now completely agree with!
1. "The one strategy I chose to expand on was Lott’s analytical writing technique."-->Good thesis very clear, restated in the next paragraph.
ReplyDelete1b. Yes
2. Yes, I liked the quote you chose, it was within the context of your thesis. Another qoute you might want to use is,"It ends with no end at all, of course, as we are all still alive, still here. And here are only permutations, variations on the themes of work and love, all lour lives splintered away from intention and desire, from will and choice, to reveal influence, finally, of Royal Crown: four men work, living, providing, going on."(189) This goes for all the times Lott said him and his brother were different individuals, that even though they were raised under the same household the couldn't be the same. This theme is later re-applied to Zeb and Jacob.
3. There was very little summary and for what you are arguing, summary doesn't seem necessary. Your quote was clear about the interplay of relationships in Lott's life.
4. Counter arguments--Lott's writing is not analytical??
5.Grammer-- Fathers sons & Brothers includes stories that are less substantial in the context that is included.....(I see what you are saying but at first this was unclear.....................each a lesson, more-so(comma after lesson)..........This is a rough draft but in the final paper try to steer clear of using I think or I believe.........while an unusual techniques it enhances the story and helps not only the reader...(technique not techniques)
6. Yes
7. No
~Good work........................
1. To me, the thesis isn't exactly clear. I know what you are trying to say, but it isn't necessarily in thesis format, so it makes it confusing to pinpoint. I do like what you are trying to say, but it is a little confusing to me. Are you trying to say that he is trying analyze his own writing while he is writing it? Because you say that "he is analyzing his own work" but before that you said that he is writing not only about the events, but about he feels about it. I think you may want to clear that up a little bit for the final draft.
ReplyDelete1b. yes, the author and title are in it immediately
2. I do like the example that you used because he comes out and says "what i believe". I think that the analysis of that quote needs to be a little bit stronger, because you get me mixed up when you say that he relates his brothers to the sons; kind of confusing. If you are trying to prove that he is analyzing the events or stories, I would use the essay Wadmalow because that is a lot of self reflection, and a lot of Lott and what he is thinking. Make sure that you cite the page number at the end of your quotation!
3. There was not that much summary, which is really good. With what you are trying to portray, I think that you don't necessarily need summary.
4. As a counter argument, someone may disagree and say that they don't like that style of writing.
5. grammar- what Daniel said
6. You seem to use "i think" and "i believe" a lot in your writing, and it should be a little bit more direct. Just come out and say it, and then prove your point without hesitation. Be confident because you have strong idea!
7. The only place I got off the thesis was the explanation of the quote, which I already said, so the rest was really good.
Great start!